Swimming & Parenting Lessons
We are so fortunate to have an indoor and an outdoor pool right here in our neighborhood which we can go to as often as we'd like. One of the perks of having these pools are the summer swim lessons. This year since Jaden is 3, she was able to sign up for lessons and with her love of the water, I just knew she would do GREAT!
On the first day of her lessons, Jaden went right into the water, participated in every game, drill and activity, and actually was (in my opinion!) the best swimmer in the group. She had no fear of the water and loved trying the new things her instructors told her to do. On day two however, she pulled a stunt that she just loves to pull...she refused to go into the water. She's done this with a couple of activites that she's gotten involved in where she does great at first, then decides she doesn't want to do it. It is so frustrating as a parent because I see how well she does at first and I don't want to make her do something if she really doesn't want to do it, but I know that deep down, she does want to participate, but is trying to exert her own control over a situation. So on day 2 of lessons when she said "I don't want to swim. I want to go home and go to bed," we did just that. I was frustrated and wanted to call her bluff. So we came home and while I played with Sienna and Piper, Jaden had to lie in her bed with no toys, books or anything else to occupy her. And she laid there until lunch when her daddy came home and had a strict talk with her about listening to mommy and participating in the activites she wants to sign up for.
Now, looking back I may have gotten frustrated too quickly, which is why I called this "Swimming & Parenting Lessons." I definitely learned a good lesson from this entire incident, one that I share here because we've found an incredible solution which is working like a charm for us and Jaden! I was in such a funk after Jaden refused to swim that day that I was sad, angry and everything in between. But once I had a chance to calm down, take some advice from other experienced parents and think about what other solutions there could be to this problem, I came up with something. I added to Jaden's chore chart a line titled, "Listens to mom" and I explained to her that she does not get her sticker for that line each day unless she goes into her activities without any problems. And you know what, as soon as we implemented that, Jaden was going right into the pool and showing off her swimming skills each day of lessons.
Children are constantly testing us and we are constantly having to figure them out. For Jaden, this is what worked. It may or may not work for another child, especially since all she gets for doing each thing on her chore chart is a sticker and nothing more, but for Jaden, the recognition of getting her daily stickers is huge. I think it really builds her up to see how excited mommy and daddy are for her daily accomplishments.
In the meantime, to help me better cope the next time Jaden pulls a little stunt, I have purchased three books and began reading them this week: Parenting with Love and Logic, The New Strong-Willed Child & You Can't Make Me (But I Can Be Persuaded). I highly recommend all three of these books, and was so happy I could purchase them not only to keep on hand for future reference, but to also be able to lend them out to other moms who need the wisdom each of them offers!
So now that I've explained the parenting lesson part, back to the swimming lessons!! Jaden accomplished so much during her first two weeks of lessons, and she's excited to take two more weeks of lessons beginning on Monday. She did front & back floats, used her "big scoopers" (freestyle stroke arms) to move around with, did freestyle stroke, swam through a hula-hoop, went after toys across the pool and under the water, jumped into the water, and much more. Enjoy the photos of her showing off her stuff on the last day of her second week:
going under the water and coming back up...not a problem for little Jaden!
swimming through the hula-hoop so well!
showing off her freestyle stroke, complete with her face in the water--she can swim approximately 2 1/2 to 3 yards which is incredible!
a better view of her swimming into the hula-hoop
using her "big scoopers" to retrieve a duck and a turtle during one of the activites
jumping in...leave it to my little Jaden to jump in with such enthusiasm!
On the first day of her lessons, Jaden went right into the water, participated in every game, drill and activity, and actually was (in my opinion!) the best swimmer in the group. She had no fear of the water and loved trying the new things her instructors told her to do. On day two however, she pulled a stunt that she just loves to pull...she refused to go into the water. She's done this with a couple of activites that she's gotten involved in where she does great at first, then decides she doesn't want to do it. It is so frustrating as a parent because I see how well she does at first and I don't want to make her do something if she really doesn't want to do it, but I know that deep down, she does want to participate, but is trying to exert her own control over a situation. So on day 2 of lessons when she said "I don't want to swim. I want to go home and go to bed," we did just that. I was frustrated and wanted to call her bluff. So we came home and while I played with Sienna and Piper, Jaden had to lie in her bed with no toys, books or anything else to occupy her. And she laid there until lunch when her daddy came home and had a strict talk with her about listening to mommy and participating in the activites she wants to sign up for.
Now, looking back I may have gotten frustrated too quickly, which is why I called this "Swimming & Parenting Lessons." I definitely learned a good lesson from this entire incident, one that I share here because we've found an incredible solution which is working like a charm for us and Jaden! I was in such a funk after Jaden refused to swim that day that I was sad, angry and everything in between. But once I had a chance to calm down, take some advice from other experienced parents and think about what other solutions there could be to this problem, I came up with something. I added to Jaden's chore chart a line titled, "Listens to mom" and I explained to her that she does not get her sticker for that line each day unless she goes into her activities without any problems. And you know what, as soon as we implemented that, Jaden was going right into the pool and showing off her swimming skills each day of lessons.
Children are constantly testing us and we are constantly having to figure them out. For Jaden, this is what worked. It may or may not work for another child, especially since all she gets for doing each thing on her chore chart is a sticker and nothing more, but for Jaden, the recognition of getting her daily stickers is huge. I think it really builds her up to see how excited mommy and daddy are for her daily accomplishments.
In the meantime, to help me better cope the next time Jaden pulls a little stunt, I have purchased three books and began reading them this week: Parenting with Love and Logic, The New Strong-Willed Child & You Can't Make Me (But I Can Be Persuaded). I highly recommend all three of these books, and was so happy I could purchase them not only to keep on hand for future reference, but to also be able to lend them out to other moms who need the wisdom each of them offers!
So now that I've explained the parenting lesson part, back to the swimming lessons!! Jaden accomplished so much during her first two weeks of lessons, and she's excited to take two more weeks of lessons beginning on Monday. She did front & back floats, used her "big scoopers" (freestyle stroke arms) to move around with, did freestyle stroke, swam through a hula-hoop, went after toys across the pool and under the water, jumped into the water, and much more. Enjoy the photos of her showing off her stuff on the last day of her second week:
going under the water and coming back up...not a problem for little Jaden!
swimming through the hula-hoop so well!
showing off her freestyle stroke, complete with her face in the water--she can swim approximately 2 1/2 to 3 yards which is incredible!
a better view of her swimming into the hula-hoop
using her "big scoopers" to retrieve a duck and a turtle during one of the activites
jumping in...leave it to my little Jaden to jump in with such enthusiasm!
Comments
And I think I need to check out those books... thanks for the tip!